More Information Authentic Conversation “I believe we can change the world if we start listening to one another again. Simple, honest, human conversation. Not meditation, negotiation, problem-solving, debate, or public meetings. Simple, truthful conversation where we each have a chance to speak, we each feel heard, and we each listen well.” Ever notice how after a social situation, you’re tired and ready to relax? This comes because most of us are continually putting up a social face to engage with others. We might call it something like “being on” and recognize it only when we’re sick and unable to relate to people with the extra energy it takes to “be social”. Ever notice how in an emergency, when someone is hurt, or when everyone is focused on the storm or something real, there is a different kind of engagement? Because we don’t have the option to be “social” in an emergency, we move into conversations that are deeply meaningful to the situation at hand. What might happen if every conversation we had came from the “real” place that gets activated in an emergency? What if now is the time to get this real with everyone we relate to, because we are in an emergency where every thought and action counts? Gather the Women invites you into the kind of conversations that cultivate authentic relationships because they communicate real experiences, rather than the experiences we think we should be having. Sometimes this kind of communication is a bit clumsy. We have difficulty trusting that our real experience is worth speaking. Some of us always choose to put our best foot forward. Others of us always share our troubles and woes because that’s honestly how we feel. The noteworthy aspect of these communications is the “always”. If we have a kind of habitual conversation (are we always relating to a particular person the same way?), we’re probably not in the moment, probably not sharing our truth, probably not listening to others, probably not responding from our true heart. These are the guidelines: truth, listening and responding from the heart. These are the signposts: feelings of relaxation, rightness, and discovery. Let’s change the world. Let’s learn from each other as we practice this new culture of authenticity.
On Meaningful Conversation Meaningful Conversations:
Some Elements of Meaningful Conversation are that they are
Suggestions for Honoring Time in Circle One of the things I have learned since I started holding gatherings in circle is that as the convener I need to do the math. If I have 20 women and each one speaks for 5 minutes that is an hour and 40 minutes. If two women in the circle talk for 15 minutes, that puts us at two hours. You get the picture. Before you know it, you have to start seeing where to trim the day’s agenda. We always read the circle guidelines at the beginning. What my circle partner, Darcy, and I also say at the start and when needed is: “In order to honor our time - we have until X:00 for this circle - and give everyone an opportunity to share, let’s keep our comments to xxx minutes.” Darcy or I take on the role of Guardian and ring the bell for a pause as a gentle reminder of the guidelines. If I do not use a Guardian, then I, as the convener, can ring the bell and ask for a pause, or anyone can ask for a pause. Being in circle can be very emotional, and some people feel so safe they begin to share and lose track of time. A gentle ring of the bell and reminder of the time brings the circle back into intention. In a more relaxed informal circle gathering, time is usually not a limiting factor as long as everyone gets an opportunity to share and does so with what Christina Baldwin calls “responsibility for the quality of the experience”. Using a talking piece is also a way to honor time and to discourage “cross-talk”, but it helps to set the intention (parameters) by reading the guidelines and being clear about time so everyone knows.
Holding the Rim of the Circle I always remember that the circle is like a basket or a vessel. The rim needs to be solid to hold all that goes into it and for everyone to feel safe. I check before I ring the bell to start to see if I can see everyone’s eyes. If I can’t, I ask them to scoot in or out to make sure it’s a strong rim that will hold all that energy without leaking, and I explain why that is important. As I said at our GTW gathering, sitting in a “wobbly” circle is just impossible for me now that I know how important holding the rim is. 
Engage Your Creativity If you feel any activation of your talents and heart’s desires as you experience GTW, if you find yourself called to participate in any way in GTW, we few that are holding this space will welcome you with open arms. Consider reviewing what you might contribute to this mobilization of women. Are you passionate about:
To connect with someone in your area and bring your passion forward,
"If it is to be, it is up to me." Gather the Women is a global community, a sisterhood of diverse women transforming distances, differences and isolation into opportunities for collaboration and leadership. We are together in this deep intention to unite the human family, and together we can make our unity visible. We are asking each one of you to help us reach out to new women: It’s easy—just
If only 3 women tell 3 women we have 9. If those 9 women tell 3 women we have 27. If those 27 women tell 3 women we have 81. If those 81 tell 3 women we have 243, etc. As you can see by day 18 we have 1,162,261,467 women.
1) Post your circle or gathering on the Internet:
2) Submit a press release or an article to local publications.
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