by: Jeanie DeRousseau
“I believe we can change the world if we start listening to one another again. Simple, honest, human conversation. Not meditation, negotiation, problem-solving, debate, or public meetings. Simple, truthful conversation where we each have a chance to speak, we each feel heard, and we each listen well.”
—Turning to One Another, Margaret Wheatley
Ever notice how after a social situation, you’re tired and ready to relax? This comes because most of us are continually putting up a social face to engage with others. We might call it something like “being on” and recognize it only when we’re sick and unable to relate to people with the extra energy it takes to “be social”.
Ever notice how in an emergency, when someone is hurt, or when everyone is focused on the storm or something real, there is a different kind of engagement? Because we don’t have the option to be “social” in an emergency, we move into conversations that are deeply meaningful to the situation at hand.
What might happen if every conversation we had came from the “real” place that gets activated in an emergency? What if now is the time to get this real with everyone we relate to, because we are in an emergency where every thought and action counts?
Gather the Women invites you into the kind of conversations that cultivate authentic relationships because they communicate real experiences, rather than the experiences we think we should be having.
Sometimes this kind of communication is a bit clumsy. We have difficulty trusting that our real experience is worth speaking. Some of us always choose to put our best foot forward. Others of us always share our troubles and woes because that’s honestly how we feel.
The noteworthy aspect of these communications is the “always”. If we have a kind of habitual conversation (are we always relating to a particular person the same way?), we’re probably not in the moment, probably not sharing our truth, probably not listening to others, probably not responding from our true heart.
These are the guidelines: truth, listening and responding from the heart. These are the signposts: feelings of relaxation, rightness, and discovery. Let’s change the world. Let’s learn from each other as we practice this new culture of authenticity.