by Nancy Busey Let’s talk about the role of the guardian. What exactly are guardians, what do they do, and what is their relationship to the host? Together, let’s use the metaphor of a campfire to describe the difference between the host’s and guardian’s roles. The host’s job is to put logs on the fire, keeping us warm. The guardian’s job is to make sure that nobody around the circle gets so close to the fire that they get burned. In an untended circle, someone might not feel respected. Someone else might take up all the oxygen in the room. Another might not feel heard. The guardian’s role is to make sure that these things do not happen. The host is not responsible for controlling the process as much as they are responsible for creating a safe space for the participants to engage in the process. The entire group is responsible for holding the circle: the host is there to make sure the process is safe and to maintain the general tenor of the circle process, as well as contributing their own thoughts and ideas. While the host may take on the role of the guardian, it is often helpful to have a separate individual in this role. Guardians pay attention to all the subtle energetic movements of everyone in the circle to ensure the safety of participants. The guardian has the group’s permission to interrupt and intercede in a circle process: to call for a pause, using a gentle noise-maker, such as a chime, bell or rattle, that signals to everyone to stop action, take a breath, and rest in a space of silence. As the guardian invites us into silence, those in the circle can re-balance, return to their bodies, re-center, and self-regulate. Guardians keep the fire from getting too hot, but they also notice the moment when “we lean into shared purpose,” when the warmth of the circle’s wisdom emerges, and no one wants to leave the campfire. Guardians pay attention to what has been spoken out loud, but they also notice what has not been voiced. They are aware of who has spoken and sense into the voice of the voiceless. Noticing and sensing are practices of presence and compassion, rather than analysis or judgement. Guardians can ring the bell to celebrate a milestone, acknowledge deep grief, or revel in a moment of self-compassion. Anyone may ask the guardian or host to use the sounding device for a pause. Then after the 15 - 30 second pause, the person requesting the pause should explain the reason. An example: “Let’s consider this moment to bring us back to center.” Although in any given circle, the guardian may not need to say much, the role is just as important as the host’s. Circles resonate when host and guardian work collaboratively, attuning to each other to create a safe container for both individual circle members and the circle as a whole. Circle processes are powerful tools. In the current climate of polarization and cancel culture, bringing people together in a circle, a powerful modality throughout human existence, holds the promise of transformation. This is Gather the Women Global Matrix.

The skies are full. The air is thick. Electricity bounces off me and the air. I can feel her. Here in my heart. Memories bounce around….of fireworks, and friends. Dogs and kiddos. Harvesting in the garden – quick before the rains come! A day when everything flowed easily…. shopping – did you get those earrings?,.. or walking up the road – did you see that cool plant, what was that, we’ll have to look it up – sshhh, did you hear that? Is it a bear, is it a turkey, ?? quick let’s go! Jumping in the truck to go find the bears; climbing the rocky road – quick did you see them – there they are! It was a day like this when we saw three beautiful bear cubs. Or hiking up the road with all the animals, Abby the cat walking with us and the dogs. A view so far we could see into New Mexico. It was a day like this when we hiked together - before the rains came. Or driving around Taylor Ranch on the 4-wheeler…going places we probably shouldn’t have gone… but - did you see that?? it’s Dick’s dumping ground--- keep going…did you see that? quick stop – let me get it, that deer skull; look at that cool rock, we better get back, the rains are going to come--- did you see that huge mushroom? It was a day like this when we drove the property with Sadie the dog, and……… didn’t get home before the rains came. Or lounging in the hot tub one early spring morning…. sshhh, look, there’s a bear over there – quick, get down, don’t move!, oh wait, make noise--- oh wow, he’s going the other way, we must have scared him away – Yeah, we were almost lesbian soup! It was a day like this when we were naked in the hot tub. Or going to our friends’ house… did you bring the slippers? – I’ve got the food….laughing with friends; playing Mexican Train. Man, that Jackie, she always wins! unless of course, Don wins…standing on their porch looking across the way at the green covered mountain, waiting on the rains to come. It was a day like this when we laughed a lot with friends. Or splitting and stacking wood together…do you need help with that one? , nope, I’ve got it – watch out-- it’s gonna crack open! You’re sure a good stacker...Man, that bucket was the best thing we ever bought up here! I’m gonna go hop in. It was a day like this when we worked on wood together. Or driving around in the golf cart in Oregon…Max the 3-legged between us - quick, look up there, do you see the osprey’s nest? Give me the binocs, oh yeah there it is! I sure like being by the water here – yeah, except for the foghorn – yeah. We’ll have to get a sound machine. It was a day like this when we saw the osprey’s nest. On these kinds of days after all was done, we would sit together – on the couch, or in front of the fireplace, or in the rig, and we would turn and look in each other’s eyes, and she would say…. “This was a good day.” And I would agree: “Yeah….it was. It was a really good day.” A day of possibility.